Topic: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Taake- True norwegian black metallers in full on evil gear and corpse paint take the stage with singer giving it the old 'arrrghhhh, i'm holding a brick', whole crowd is in a rapture until the band realise their bassist isn't on stage and they are left standing looking very un-evilly silly waiting for the guy to not only show up but plug in and tune up. A Tap moment if ever there was one. They were actually amazing though.

Wolves in the Throne Room - eco-friendly emo black metallers ironically insisted on using smoke machines at the star & garter in manchester, set off the smoke detector which cut the power. They were then left standing with the proverbial dick in hand and had to wait for the guy that looks like a status quo roadie to fix it all for them. Very eco-friendly.

Shank - bass player in a small practice room in glasgow gave a very heartfelt and relatively lengthy speech about how the carpet bombing of tokyo is always forgotten about because of the more 'exciting' vision of nuclear bombs in hiroshima. The gentile crowd politely wait for him to finish except for one cheeky punk who gets bored halfway through and shouts "thats no whit you said last night when you were lickin ma bum". Still a good gig though.

Hegemony consists of "the spontaneous consent given by the great masses of the population to the general direction imposed on social life by the dominant fundamental group" (Antonio Gramsci, 1926).

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Can't remember the name of the fest but it was in the old GMT in New Cross when Knuckledust and Public Disturbance played.

Crackhead mums with babies under their arms, crazy drunk Jamaican locals fighting, kids turning up with weapons, kid getting punched over the bonnet of a police car with the cops sitting inside ... it was constant entertainment for the whole afternoon. I miss that pub a lot.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

when i saw nick cave and the bad seeds in sheffield last year, nick cave fell off the stage mid-song.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

dingo?

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

pretty much any Knifed gig I attended.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

"remember up the bum, no babies"

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

windofpain wrote:

Can't remember the name of the fest but it was in the old GMT in New Cross when Knuckledust and Public Disturbance played.

Crackhead mums with babies under their arms, crazy drunk Jamaican locals fighting, kids turning up with weapons, kid getting punched over the bonnet of a police car with the cops sitting inside ... it was constant entertainment for the whole afternoon. I miss that pub a lot.

Realfest, that was my first DIY gig outside of hampshire and I almost never went to another hardcore show again

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Jim Hart breaking his arm at the 1in12 (during Voorhees?) and the whole crowd singing "jim harts going to hospital" whilst he was waiting for the ambulance.

My mate at a SxE do in london about 10 years ago steaming into a crowd of windmilling idiots with a splif in one hand and a beer in the other screaming at the top of his voice. Edgemaster ninja`s all of a sudden stopping and sloping off.

My mate grabbing the singer from the Dwarves knackers at the birmingham gig about 10 years ago. Said singer repeatedly hit him in the head with the mic. but they had to get their bouncer mate to step in. Not so rock n roll tough afterall.

Putting on FATDAY in bristol at a bikers pub, and the band dressing up as angels, bumble bee`s and covering themselves in oil. the bikers were most bemused.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

windofpain wrote:

Can't remember the name of the fest but it was in the old GMT in New Cross when Knuckledust and Public Disturbance played.
Crackhead mums with babies under their arms, crazy drunk Jamaican locals fighting, kids turning up with weapons, kid getting punched over the bonnet of a police car with the cops sitting inside ... it was constant entertainment for the whole afternoon. I miss that pub a lot.

My enduring memories of this great day were Daz from xCanaanx rolling about in the middle of the main road having a fight with some guy mid-afternoon and later on some joker tagging a police car while the police were inside arresting one of the afforementioned Jamaican dudes.

mikeplanes wrote:

when i saw nick cave and the bad seeds in sheffield last year, nick cave fell off the stage mid-song.

He does this spectacularly on the "Live at the Paradiso" DVD too!

Can you really be sure of the goddamn time of day?

10 (edited by Ad 08-05-2009 13:24:40)

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

We played a gig in Birmingham that had got double booked with a Metal gig. Both gigs got combined. One band had a grinning Roy Chubby Brown-a-like on vocals, talking like he was playing Wembley Stadium rather than to 25 punters in the upstairs room of a pub, and a line of punks down the side taking the piss (us).  Then the second band produced one of the most hilariously pathetic sights I’ve ever seen. Finishing up a song, the guitarist triumphantly hurls his guitar pick into the adoring crowd, whereby it flutters to the floor like a feather on the wind, and settles there among a room of about (at that point) 10 disinterested people.
If a tumbleweed could have blown by at the point, it would have been wholly appropriate.
(this is admittedly more of a visual gag, rather than one relatable at a later date on a internet forum)

11

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

windofpain wrote:

Can't remember the name of the fest but it was in the old GMT in New Cross when Knuckledust and Public Disturbance played.

Crackhead mums with babies under their arms, crazy drunk Jamaican locals fighting, kids turning up with weapons, kid getting punched over the bonnet of a police car with the cops sitting inside ... it was constant entertainment for the whole afternoon. I miss that pub a lot.

Good times... the New Cross Inn's not quite the same, is it?

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

xmilox wrote:
windofpain wrote:

Can't remember the name of the fest but it was in the old GMT in New Cross when Knuckledust and Public Disturbance played.
Crackhead mums with babies under their arms, crazy drunk Jamaican locals fighting, kids turning up with weapons, kid getting punched over the bonnet of a police car with the cops sitting inside ... it was constant entertainment for the whole afternoon. I miss that pub a lot.

My enduring memories of this great day were Daz from xCanaanx rolling about in the middle of the main road having a fight with some guy mid-afternoon and later on some joker tagging a police car while the police were inside arresting one of the afforementioned Jamaican dudes.

my abiding memory is the sheer number of arkangel, strife and "vegan militia" t-shirts

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

There was a creepy guy who used to come to gigs around 2002-4 in london who was completely unable to dance around about the time that whole "two step" craze was kicking off. OUTSIDE some alldayer at the verge he decided to show off his "skills" and proceeded to trip over his own feet and fall flat on his arse in front of about fifty people, who all promptly burst out laughing.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

All at the abandon ship 'christmas show' at the hobgoblin last year

1) No one dancing to reality and then Rob Boyce jokingly saying 'if you're not going to mosh, go home' ....followed by various members of Fall of Effrafa walking out of the pub.


2) A freshly moved in Andy Auld blowing his hipster credentials by skipping from side to side with his arms in the air like he'd just won at bingo for most of dead swans set. Shortly followed by....


3) My semi-drunk mother casualing walking through the middle of the crowd as loads of people went off to some totally abitary breakdown part.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

I didn't witness it myself but the Jesus Years and Explorer boys told me about the time that they ended up playing an all dayer with Bring Me the Horizon (I think!) and as he jumped into the crowd, his emo wig went flying!

Wish I'd have been there for that!

"I'm up to my knees in the original cast of mash..."
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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Murphy's bell-end.

remem mr shaka droppin dis inna dance tha fogg ?horn was bone crackin big tunne

17

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

'Crazy' Niels moshing through a closed fire exit door at Dirty Money in Nottingham last year, pulling off the cloth draping which was flimsily held up by drawing pins, then trying to pin it back up much to no avail.

"Before I give my own review of this book I just want to say that I am a huge harry potter fan, to the extent that I actually have a deathly hallows tattoo on my bottom. I'm also quite ill right now, but I fought against my horrid cold to read this book. "

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

kai from feint.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Ed wrote:

'Crazy' Niels moshing through a closed fire exit door at Dirty Money in Nottingham last year, pulling off the cloth draping which was flimsily held up by drawing pins, then trying to pin it back up much to no avail.

hahaha that and ilan kicking that mosher were two of the greatest things i've ever seen

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

i put on Realfest.
Voorhees were originally supposed to play too.
i remember thinking to myself it was gonna be a strange day when i first arrived and asked the barmaid if there was any chance of a cup of tea and her telling me to fuck off.

some years later Realfest 2 at the Swan featured a load of undercover police infiltrating the show!

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

mattybar wrote:

some years later Realfest 2 at the Swan featured a load of undercover police infiltrating the show!

did they pay to get in?

walls of jericho. Russ(think it was) against the XXX idiots is Sheffield. was funny.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

our russ? russ schnell? even it wasn't I can imagine him doing that.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

mattybar wrote:

i put on Realfest.
Voorhees were originally supposed to play too.
i remember thinking to myself it was gonna be a strange day when i first arrived and asked the barmaid if there was any chance of a cup of tea and her telling me to fuck off.

some years later Realfest 2 at the Swan featured a load of undercover police infiltrating the show!

I had to load the PA in through the 'other' back room in the Swan once. All they had in there was a barbeque (yes, indoors) and a bunch of the locals sitting around a TV watching porn, eating jerk chicken and drinking Guinness. It was the best thing I'd ever seen.

Be polite
In the pyramid you hate

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Steve Warwick dancing with a toothless crack whore to Diana Ross, post-Birds of Delay / Emeralds gig in some shithole in Cincinnati.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

I remember turning up early to one of Jack's gigs at the swan once, drunk, and watching videos of girls shaking their arses on a projector in the back room. I thought I was in heaven