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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

breather-resist wrote:
Grady wrote:

my mum crowdsurfing as we supported The Offspring
most gigs of Tim's with Karl and Toby in the audience
Shoes' benefit show - STD are on stage as i walk in - first thing i hear from Tim's mouth "Great show, great cause, great cancer research" - on the money

Especially as the Shoes gig was for a Leukemia benefit.

I remember the last Soon The Darkness show being hilarious. Electrowerkz with some hair metal band. It was a slimelight night so there were loads of old fat people there in full fetish get up. We ended up getting bumped to headline which involved cages of Suicide Girls on stage. 30 seconds in, Marcus has decked out Tim, gets booted out by security and Tobs is trying to climb into a dancers cage..... fucking brilliant night.

my favourite story, ben should be on jackanory! :)

funny thing happened to me at a miss black america gig in 2002. the singer decided to crowd surf and i didn't want to be squashed by him so i moved and he landed on his friend who was standing next to me! stop being like the manics and then i'll care more.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Kingmob wrote:
Pandasrule wrote:

The singer from Oi Polloi making a standard issue anti-capitalism speech at trashfest before setting fire to a mcdonalds cup. In his head the cup went up like a firework and provided the perfect intro to the song, in reality the mcdonald's cup wasn't flammable so he stood there with a lighter for the best part of a minute trying to singe it and failed miserably.

They usually have a tiny wee cocktail stick sized American Flag. That seldom lights properly either. I've seen up to seven punks stood holding lighters aloft attempting to get the little bastards to catch.

Yeah those cocktail flags are always comedic!
Years ago went to see OI POLLOI in Winchester & was with two Norwegian friends who that day had just flown back from 6 months in Central/South America.  They were pretty freaked out anyway from the culture shock of not having been to a punk gig while they were away, so when Deek said "John Major, he's a fucking wanker. If he came to this gig he'd get his fucking head kicked", Mona turned to me & said "as if John Major would come to a punk gig in Winchester"!

You Wanna Buy The WHOLE IN THE HEAD Single, Or CONSTANT STATE OF TERROR, But They're Not Pressed In Red, So You Buy FUCKED UP Instead.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

roddy_thor_neithercut wrote:
Kingmob wrote:

The Singer from Step On It slipping on Bannana Peel mid set and going down like something from a Buster Keaton film.

i was just gonna mention that ha ha

That is utterly brilliant

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Braddock....

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v492/bbtothehead/2009_0509CapCas0010copy.jpg
Yeah!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v492/bbtothehead/2009_0509CapCas0065copy.jpg
Oh yeah!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v492/bbtothehead/2009_0509CapCas0011copy.jpg
YES YES YES!!!

picket fence cartel stole my best china
Flickrfffun

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

What a great thread!

I think my favorite moment was when my band played a show at The Matrix in Grimsby a few years ago.  We played with a band called Gas Station Flowers and when they show up we notice they brought their own drumkit which they put up in front of the little stage where our backline was.  We told them they could use our kit since theirs was pretty shit but they said it was alright.  So when it's time for them to go on they set everything up and tune up but then disappear for like 20-25 minutes, apparently to hang out at the bar.  They eventually come up and start playing, then it's come to the end of their set (or so their drummer thought) because at the end of one of the songs he completely trashes his drumkit, pushes it over and kicks it so everything goes bang but the other guys just stand watching him.  Then I can hear the guitarist say to the drummer "that wasn't the last song, we still have one left."  The drummer, looking quite embarrassed, picks up his kit and sets it up to play one more song and the end of which he trashes his drumkit AGAIN but this time the other guys in the band follow his lead and trash their instruments as well before walking off stage in an emotionally-unstable-artist kind of way.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Hahaha, half of Wooderson, right there. It used to really upset me when they smashed instruments. I remember their guitarist Dhani wasn't 100% into the smashing, and on their last show carefully placed his beautiful telecaster to one side, only to have one of the bands groupies run on stage and smash the fuck out of it!

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Edgecrusher2k8 wrote:
mattybar wrote:

i put on Realfest.
Voorhees were originally supposed to play too.
i remember thinking to myself it was gonna be a strange day when i first arrived and asked the barmaid if there was any chance of a cup of tea and her telling me to fuck off.

some years later Realfest 2 at the Swan featured a load of undercover police infiltrating the show!

Did Stampin' Ground headline that Realfest? That was an odd day for sure...went on my own to that one and knew no-one there.

What was the deal with the police at the Swan?

yep SG headlined. Definitely a day to remember.
I don't think I went to a single gig at GMT that wasn't memorable in one way or another.
Whether it was punk dudes pissing on the crowd outside from the rooftop of the building next door or a full on armed shoot out with police on the high street.... something was always happening at that place.

At the Swan, we were all stood in a circle smoking outside (everyone was smoking inside too but the heat was unbearable) in the little backyard when this woman suddenly appeared talking into a walkie talkie. I don't think she noticed us which was lucky as there was about 4 spliffs going around and we all just stood there frozen on the spot. For the rest of the day I had my weed stashed in some sxe kid's bag.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Hard To Swallow  in Bristol somewhere I think, Gords threw his bass across the stage, it hit the fire escape door, which opened then it crashed down the fire escape stairs into the beer garden to the shock of everyone sat out there.

Dead Inside ??  two punks grapling in front of us and do the same as Gord's bass above  , brilliant!

Dead Inside again supporting Boredoms to a packed out crowd at Brighton Concorde, we went down like shit, paul fell over, I got into a punch up with some dick in the crowd,  actually more shite than funny.

Killing Floor Nottingham years ago, Guitarist sean headbutting and breaking the nose of the bass player for being too loud.

Listen to THE STALIN

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Amazing hat/shirt combo here.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

bloodykev wrote:

Hard To Swallow  in Bristol somewhere I think, Gords threw his bass across the stage, it hit the fire escape door, which opened then it crashed down the fire escape stairs into the beer garden to the shock of everyone sat out there.

Dead Inside ??  two punks grapling in front of us and do the same as Gord's bass above  , brilliant!

.

hahaha excellent.

OUT NOW:TITV:003 - Tide of Iron(UK)/Grace(UK) - 7", TITV:004 - Set Aside for Genocide(USA) - CS - Demo, TITV:010 - Owl(USA) - 7"

COMING OUT SOON:TITV:007 - Human Junk(UK)/God's America(USA) - 7" , TITV:009 - Corrupt Humanity(Scotland)/Unholy Grave(Japan) - 7" ,TITV:011 - Manic Scum(USA) - Better Left Undead CS, TITV:012 - Hatred Division(Malaysia)/Unholy Grave(Japan) - 7"

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Toby - AIDS hat?

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Guildford moments.

Dave's leaving gig at Backline. Place was a rehearsal studio in some railway arches where someone worked, the main room would be booked for a practice, there'd be a busy gig, and the place would be cleaned absolutely spotless so the owner didn't realise there'd been anything out of the ordinary. Dave was going off to Australia for a while, so there was a leaving gig organised - party poppers, cream pies (leading to a creamy wall of death), etc, etc. This would be the time the owner turned up to pick something up, and found his rehearsal studio full of drunk underage kids running around covered in cream, party poppers and booze.

The City Club in general. Working Men's Club we used for a bit when having trouble with the GYC. No back room or anything, just the bands playing on a stage while the regulars trundled around inside. Little 3 or 4 year olds running past the front of the stage. Main memory being Walk The Plank/SSS/Down And Outs there, and having to get a few people to brace on one side of the room to stop a seating area with a pram and some women in getting taken out by people dancing. Old men in their 70s/80s sitting at the bar while all this is going on as well, drinking away.

Even In Blackouts (?) at a Help The Aged day centre. Everywhere else was booked out, and Squinty needed a venue. Called them up on the off chance, and they said "yes". Got a Temporary Event Notice sorted. Thank god it was November 5th and not many people turned up - tables with crockery for sale placed carefully on one side, salt and pepper shakers mover around, the little old lady who unlocked sitting in her office going "It's quite loud, isn't it?".

GYC gig where we realise all the 13/14 year old kids are standing over the other side of the road, looking at the upstairs windows. Cross over and find out that someone's getting a blow job, and you can see the head moving.

Lief Ericsson and Milloy gig, where the Milloy drummer plays with an Extra Strong Mint shoved up his arse for some reason.

GYC gig where we keep smelling smoke inside and are checking vents and stuff for an hour or so, before someone runs out holding a burning 3 foot tall plastic pot plant.

Himsa gig at the GYC where the singer gets one of the kids in a headlock and is shouting about it being "my fucking stage!" There is no stage at the GYC.

The Unknown gig at the GYC organised at one week's notice. Brian from The Unknown's birthday, and it coincides with Bottoms Up discontinuing a lot of types of spirits and selling them off half price. Including Agwa. Gig starts with a pool table with about 15 different bottles of spirits on it. Party Poppers halfway through set off the fire alarm, fire brigade turn up with us frantically hiding booze. Brian is stoked, as he's a fireman back home and spends about 20 minutes chatting about this with the fire brigade.

Godnose from Australia at the GYC, where Ben the singer spends the gig dressed as Steve Irwin and wrestling an inflatable crocodile while shouting "CRIKEY!" a lot.

Giving Matt from The Rites a cordless mic, him singing from the toilets, the roof, while doing laps of the outside of the GYC, inside a storage cupboard, etc.

Party Garbage/Last Worker And Parasite/Motherfuckers gig, loads of party poppers/cannons, silly string, Worker And Parasite dressed in Wizard Of Oz outfits which couldn't actually be cleaned by the place they rented them from, the floor staining from the ink in the party poppers.

Dan Potthast/Ye Wiles at the GYC leading to a broken window, and someone getting taken away by ambulance with the police in attendance. At a Dan Potthast gig...

Various times of Ellis getting naked, generally involving either Agwa, or an impromptu thrash band.

Forgetting to collect the mic stands with the PA for the Fig 4.0 gig, and making ones with gaffer tape, coat hangers and bits of broken drum stands nicked from the rehearsal studios rubbish bin.

Two random people turning up halfway through Holy Ghost Revival playing with Clorox Girls, and walking in with a sofa. They sat down at the back on it for about three minutes, and then left leaving it there. Rest of the gig involves people being thrown at other people on the sofa (ie: someone on the sofa, sofa picked up, sofa thrown across room).

Homeless man turning up and spending the gig telling people that he used to be a russian submarine captain.

Cringing/funny - Halloween gig where Joe 90 and Muttley's Dastardley Skam were due to play. MDS take ages setting up and playing, and then we realise there's no time for Joe 90 to play. With them having driven down from Leeds. In full zombie make up. Still feel bad about that.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

MattWPBS wrote:

Homeless man turning up and spending the gig telling people that he used to be a russian submarine captain.

is that the same guy who when I turned up early made friends with me and proceeded to start huffing gas. Got in without paying and whilst bands were setting up you could hear a very quiet "weeeehhhhhh" coming from the gas canister that said bum was imbibing.


I saw bane a couple of times, their singer is really ugly

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

No, no - that was another one.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

MattWPBS wrote:

GYC gig where we realise all the 13/14 year old kids are standing over the other side of the road, looking at the upstairs windows. Cross over and find out that someone's getting a blow job, and you can see the head moving.

this reminds me of a story about two 14 year olds having sex in the alley behind the ivy house in peckham.. always interesting going there.

usually what would happen is the boys from the estate opposite would climb over the walls so they wouldn't have to pay to get in, and one time some other kids attempted to do the same along the other wall. only on the other side of the wall these kids were climbing over were big hutch type things. i remember seeing one guy climb over, falling into the hutch and climbing out through the hutch door only for someone doing security to come into the garden at that exact moment, grab them as soon as they climbed out through the hutch door and kick them out.

Pseudo Colonial Pineapple Tour, 2011

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Birds Of Prey at the Fenton: Nick Jones rugby tackling drunk oap, Steve Warwick arriving 5 minutes into his band's set and then inserting some of his fingers into his rectum for the duration.

Andrew WK at ATP: David Tibet coming out during "Party Hard" wearing corpse paint and a tweed suit. and being drunk and just screaming a bit, whilst Bad Brilliance just shouted "HOLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYY SHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTT" all the time. Completely 3D stuff.

The Dragon Rapide at the Packhorse: Some tiny drunk little guy grabbing the mic and singing over a couple of songs in a bangra/wolfman howling style. Then, when Jon Nash finally stopped seeing the funny side, he banished him from the stage. 10 minutes later, there was a bit of screaming from the back of the room as he slumped at the bottom of a wall. He showed Paul Steere a photo of his sister's grave.

I'm not into that.

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

My favourite Guildford moments are pretty much entirely from Endfest 1. Send More Paramedics playing to a room with probably twice as many people in there as there should have been...Gaz and Ellis(?) trying to recreate the high-fives and stage dives photo again and again whilst Dead By Dawn(?) play...everything Buttmelt did...

But then there is the Dean Dirg/Steal show which ended with the floor being completely sodden with water, bodies flying all over the place, Gaz starting on the agro Arsenal fan ("I 8 Spurs")...

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

gawkrodger wrote:

ha so many good ones from the Swan.

I always liked when the chinese knock-off DVD sellers wandered in trying to flog their wares mid-set

swan was cool. when we played an all dayer there, chinese dvd sellers, mid set as people were diving over people oblivious to what was going on, big jamaicans standing there nodding as the madness went on..

being this cool is a full time job, you never get the weekends off.

www.myspace.com/jesusofspazzarethband
new band - King of Pigs HC

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

ponte_ricky wrote:

i was at a show in birmingham recently where the drummer from fuck right off during the middle of another bands set decided to run on stage and dive on top of the drums. that was fucking hilarious

heh heh that was our set, they were fuckin hammered.
completely out the blue, launches himself up steps, onto the stage into the drums, scared the shite out of our drummer.

being this cool is a full time job, you never get the weekends off.

www.myspace.com/jesusofspazzarethband
new band - King of Pigs HC

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

andy stickerchap wrote:
ponte_ricky wrote:

i was at a show in birmingham recently where the drummer from fuck right off during the middle of another bands set decided to run on stage and dive on top of the drums. that was fucking hilarious

heh heh that was our set, they were fuckin hammered.
completely out the blue, launches himself up steps, onto the stage into the drums, scared the shite out of our drummer.

Christ, I would have been livid.

Nous ne voulons pas d'un monde ou la certitude je suis un pomme de terre de ne pas mourir de faim s'echange contre le risque de mourir d'ennui
T-I-M

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Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

shibby jay wrote:

My favourite Guildford moments are pretty much entirely from Endfest 1. Send More Paramedics playing to a room with probably twice as many people in there as there should have been...Gaz and Ellis(?) trying to recreate the high-fives and stage dives photo again and again whilst Dead By Dawn(?) play...everything Buttmelt did...

But then there is the Dean Dirg/Steal show which ended with the floor being completely sodden with water, bodies flying all over the place, Gaz starting on the agro Arsenal fan ("I 8 Spurs")...

Oh! And Mattress surfing!

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Boston has had it's moments ...

Luke The White Cider Warrior forcing Jordy from Evil Macaroni to the floor and forces his plums in to the singers face.
One pretentious emoish kid laid down on the floor to sing an entire song. The kids covered him in anything at hand ... tables, chairs, glasses, beer mats, coats ... then all jumped on top of him at the end.
Mero from Knifed vs Boston was legendary.

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

breather-resist wrote:
Grady wrote:

my mum crowdsurfing as we supported The Offspring
most gigs of Tim's with Karl and Toby in the audience
Shoes' benefit show - STD are on stage as i walk in - first thing i hear from Tim's mouth "Great show, great cause, great cancer research" - on the money

Especially as the Shoes gig was for a Leukemia benefit.

I remember the last Soon The Darkness show being hilarious. Electrowerkz with some hair metal band. It was a slimelight night so there were loads of old fat people there in full fetish get up. We ended up getting bumped to headline which involved cages of Suicide Girls on stage. 30 seconds in, Marcus has decked out Tim, gets booted out by security and Tobs is trying to climb into a dancers cage..... fucking brilliant night.

It was Ollie trying to get into the cage. I think I might have been boddy popping while grappling simon's legs. i can't remember. isn't there a photo of me holding six cans of nicked 'rider' beer, standing between two massive bearded fetish blokes in chaps?

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

Grady wrote:

Toby - AIDS hat?

Don't you remember the trap that walked into the verge and I told him you had a bag of scampi for him, or something and he kept following you around and AIDS bloodied your cap?

Re: Funniest thing you've seen at a gig....

diamond darrell getting shot cracked me up